it's always the hardest thing to say goodbye. whether to a place you've grown to love or a person close to your heart. because no matter how strong a dream can drive you to your journey there will always be the people you leave behind that breaks you all the same.

and there were instances that dreams did not matter when i lost myself because someone stole my heart and it made me feel that all i ever wanted and needed was to stay. that i was too weak to be on my own. but i know better not to. because people leave, and emotions are just as fleeting. and this time, i'm the one breaking away. i'm the one walking away to the path of my own.

"and losing your way on a journey is unfortunate. but losing your reason for the journey is a fate more cruel."

hands down, this is one of the bestest days ever.

EK day was soooooooo fun! thank you so very much guys. i wouldn't have enjoyed it this much if it weren't for each and everyone of you.

i <3 the space shuttle. my friends thought it weird that i was laughing instead of screaming my lungs out the whole time. i thought it queer too but i'unno. there's something about the andrenaline rush that makes me forget everything else happening around me--everything else i'm feeling too. it's like nothing matters. and nothing really did when you're flipping in nkilometersperhour in mid-air.

i wanted to stay at the topmost part of the wheel of fate. people hated that ride 'cause it was dull and monotonous. if i had the chance i would've stashed a pen and paper with me. it's a nice place to write or sketch really. i love the view. i love the wind. i think i could jump off. HAHA. kidding. but yeah, the phrase of the song went on replay inside my head as i was admiring the breath-taking scenery. and whatever that line is, i'll just keep to myself. so there.

but still, hands down, this is one of the bestest days EVER.

Annoying.

Our country's in a state of emergency. the peso and market fluctuated in a not so very good way. the economy is guaranteed to collapse. there are no classes[which i woke up at five o'clock for]. riots are bound to break in an instant. the media's already considered overrated. and let's not forget what happened in Leyte. everyone's restless. great. JUST GREAT[insert sarcasm here]. it's like a relapse of martial law--actually, there could be a martial law. really, the president never picked a better time[insert sarcasm here again]. pfht.

footsteps rustling against the cement floor. the lrt train rumbling its way through the overpass. gray skies. again. i flipped through the page of the magazine i was reading and surprisingly got struck by what i saw. memories reel back in. too much to take after an unscheduled interview and a tiring day.

oh world, please give me anything to write but of melancholy that burns the tongues and hearts of poets and people alike.

i do not want to go on writing because sorrow makes my hand scribble the words i could've shared with the world. i do not want my heart to resign to open season for another heartbreak. i do not want to linger on things that i should leave way behind of me. because a minute wasted in regret is a moment of happiness i could never get back.

i want to stop for a while and be able to see things as i never did for the first time. to be able to say and mean that i lived for the moment and never looked back in dismay. i'd like to dream but not let it end just where my eyes close in slumber. i want to take a break from all the harshness of reality and let myself be. even for a second. because this world has had enough of tragic stories of you and me. more than enough that is needed.

sometimes the choice you make doesn't matter 'cause it all hurts just the same.