I realized then, as i made my way past the buldings of the university through the field and saw the people dragging the white tables and chairs to the green grass for some big event that it's almost been probably a year from that same night. the night when the middle-aged, the white haired, the barely-walking people who used to call this place their second home gather again to remember distant memories of once-upon-a-time, of lost or true love, failures and redemption, of days spent will less care of what the real world had to offer, of the undeniable company of real friends. when what we felt then were easier to shout out to everybody else because we were young and crazy and wishful. because we didn't give a hell with whether the world was on our side or not.
and there were certain moments in time that i could still remember to the last word of a last decent conversation. there were days that felt it was another life i was living, or a vivid dream i was watching on replay through closed eyes. and it made me smile and it made me thankful that i'm not as bitter or as cynical with the world or circumstance as i used to be--that i got over things i used to think i'd resent for the rest of my life. i was immature and i was blind and 'the rest of my life' meant three hundred sixty five days; and i should have known better than to think so, for a lifetime itself is too long not to put aside a happy memory or a painful experience in the recesses of my heart.
and i guess these are the memories i'll remember five or ten years from now when i walk through these halls again. that i lost my way a lot of times and met people who paved the way for a while. that i found myself in the most unexpected of circumstances and learned through the pain and the belief that there is something better out there. that there were chances and choices given to me by a Higher Being. that there are people in my life right now that i would be always, always thankful for.
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