so before the year ends, here's a post (which as you would prolly notice, is kinda overdue and messy):

it feels like an ending. an ending the same as that of any year when nights stretch longer than the days and the cold becomes a familiar companion in the waking hours of morning and late afternoons. it's the same christmas tree and all its blinding lights. the same smell of peppermint and coffee coming together in a dance of sort; even the sight of gift wrappers bring nostalgia of years i can barely remember, and suddenly i find myself missing the shiny foil wrappers and the smell that wafts through the air when the presents are undone. yet amidst all the comfort of familiarity, i have never felt it so different--i've never felt so out of place.

and maybe it is supposed to be like this: life changing moments are there not because it's cruelly inevitable, but because life gives us another reason to change or become anew. the forks in the road are merely paths we haven't seen before but have always been there, and always will be, so long as we are breathing. then all the sweet detours, the last second u-turns, the unanticipated roadblocks, the needed pit stops, the humble yields, and everything in between the cracks and gutters of the road will make the destination for us. and it would all be worth it--more than worth it, in the end.

if i let it sink, i will with all certainty, drown in it.

lord knows when or how i will be able to recover from that.

HOPE.

the best way to get my mind off the all the formulas, the concepts, all the terms that are jumbled up one on top of the other, and the anxiety that comes with knowing that the biggest exam of my life is just a month away.. is a very quick, One Tree Hill re-run of my favorite episodes and moments. seriously, no other teen drama can ever come even one-strand-of-hair-close to this one. well, 1 up to season 6 anyway.

a few minutes ago, i tried this tumblr thing where you put a line from a song, or a book, or wherever, and put it in a picture that depicts the entire feeling of that line. some really hit you right smack in the middle--i've seen lots of those on Xanga. mine below is just a futile attempt, but it's very close to explaining what i feel as of this moment, and of the past few weeks. writing would have to wait until after board exams so, wish and pray for us the very best of luck, stranger. au revoir.


"People are going to disappoint you, i get that.. i kind of expect that. but i don't know, what if you wake up one day and you realize you're the disappointment?" - OTH

so here's some randomness..

Cafe Noriter. it's this korean coffee place just across DLSU-M. a good place to induce some imagination or catch up with friends or some zzz's, but not so much of productivity in terms of studying--it's too noisy most of the time due to it's popularity with the folks.

the most awaited Book Fair that happens every month of September! i could just live in this place.

i'll buy these babies when i get myself some work!

and yes, maybe some books that i could use with my profession. ugh.


my family's favorite hainanese chicken is just at EGI building next to DLSU-M! the restaurant is called Value Foods. you can tell that the owner, Mr. Tan is very passionate about the food and seeing people's satisfied faces and stomachs. so much so that he even gave us a free sushi platter for my mother's birthday. neat!


i spent my 22nd birthday with my family and we ate at Outback and had our desserts at this place called Chocolate Fire Cafe in Makati. they had a crazy selection of chocolates, with crazy prices! it's a good try nevertheless.





and last but not least..

some drama. lol.

there is something achingly beautiful about things that are fleeting. they don't rust, wither, or die away--they don't change because you never get to see them when they do. they just exist in that moment. in that second of a minute in a lifetime, our eyes and hearts try to hold on to every single intricate thing possible--the colors, the words and sentences, the music playing in the background, that unmistakable feeling in our gut. we hold on to these like the pictures we keep hidden in the boxes of our memories.

"i stand to lose if i expect anything else." - The Noises 10

so here's the deal..

building a mosque near the vicinity of the 9-11 tragedy is like giving a bike to a person who recently just lost both his legs. It's insensitive, to put it mildly. I'm not implying that they have no right to build, but they shouldn't be naive as to think no one would seriously get offended by this.

and yes, i know, this post is way overdue. but i just had to let that one out. now i can sleep like a log. au revoir!

a big ego boost but nevertheless, just a neat writing analyzer

I write like
David Foster Wallace

I Write Like by Mémoires, Mac journal software. Analyze your writing!

oh hello there, rain.

WTFH??!! The Last Airbender is only 8% in rottentomatoes?? Shyamalan just crushed, smashed, and beat to a pulp millions of children's (and some old people's) dreams and expectations about that popular cartoon in Nickelodeon including mine. I'd blood bend him until i'm satisfied if i had the chance!! (given i already have the ability) Gah.

Well at least there's still Harry Potter... which is four months away. Sigh.

Forgive the rant. I've had the sniffles for days now and it's not getting better cause of the weird weather. Pffht.

Could the weather get any more indecisive than this? It's sunny one second and rainy the next and it repeats throughout the day. Ugh.

So these are cool stuff i saw on the internet. I don't own them, mind you.

we all wish our lives were intertwined chaotically like an unused yarn ball. we all turn our backs and thoughts on parting ways, or refuse to face it head-on. but it happens all around us like time takes an unprecedented toll on people's hearts and dreams. sometimes it's as slow as a single yarn being unfurled carefully out of the mess and maze of the ball. and then there are unexpected times that it's as fast and harsh as being snipped off the whole thing.

"I forgot to remember to forget"

wrote this a few days back on a scrap of paper and found it squished with my review (ugh) papers. the months-long (or was it year-long?) hiatus on writingslashblogging has taken a massive toll on my grammar and vocabulary. it's gonna take a lot to bring the old habit back but i'll try my hardest. even if no one visits this site anymore. *3*

the reflection is barely visible in the rain drenched concrete road yet i recognize it like a dear old friend from a yearbook of several summers past. i wonder if people ever notice it--notice themselves staring back, illuminated faintly by the streetlights and shops that are never open to anyone's heart. wonder if they wish silently to themselves to be on the other side of things where regret was just another unfamiliar word found in tattered books and songs. but time isn't made for wondering aimlessly into forever or the end, eyes weren't meant to look down or back for long, and like the rain that dries up into nothingness, so do the musings.

We are but different pieces of shattered glass that never reflect the same thing.

Digging up a long forgotten song, and hearing it after so many years feels just like finding a part of yourself stuck somewhere in between the nostalgic old melody and phrases--something I never thought I'd be able to relive again.

Cheers to you, Travis.

What i love about Sundays is..

the complete, utter lack of the need to do something.. Sunny, quiet skies with the occasional sound of giant metal birds slicing through the air make for a perfect day of being a lazy bum. If only it weren't so damn hot it'd be paradise.

It used to be so easy. It was easy to just tap out the letters, see them form into words--into meaningful sentences.

It seems as if age has its way of putting us in a silent resignation. Like the words on the pages of an old book seem to wither and disappear with each falling grain of time. I still wonder when or where it started to manifest, this difficulty to write what i mean and mean what i write. Did it leave me that night? those nights? is there any way to bring it back again?