i had my head buried on my pillow that night, with my trembling hand punching the keypads and trying to explain to a friend,
i don't want to fail because it would mean to me that i've failed just about everything.
..knowing it is probably the only thing that i have control over
right now. i don't want to screw this up.
i don't want to wake up in the morning, eyes sore with the feeling of not being good enough.
i will pick myself the crap up and deal.
tomorrow, maybe.. or the day after that. or Godknowswhen. i know i will.
but right now, i'll just brood.
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